Tom: D D Immanuel Kant was a real piss-ant A Who was very rarely stable Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy beggar D Who could think you under the table David Hume could out-consume G Whilhelm Friedrich Hegel A And Wittgenstein was a beery swine D Who was just as sloshed as Schlagel A There's nothin' Nieizsche couldn't teach ya 'Bout the raising of the wrist D B7 E7 Socrates himself was permanently pissed John Stuart Mill of his own free will After half a pint o' shanty became particularly ill Plato they say, could stick it away Half a crate of whiskey every day Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle Hobbes was fond of his dram And Rene Descartes was a drunken fart `I drink therefore I am' But Socrates himself is particularly missed A lovely little thinker but a bugger when he's pissed