Tom: B VERSE 1: B5 F#5 It's Christmas Eve and I've only wrapped two fuckin' presents B5 F#5 Christmas Eve and I've only wrapped two fuckin' presents G#5 And I hate, hate, hate your guts E5 I hate, hate, hate your guts CHORUS: B5 F#5 E5 F#5 B5 And I'll never talk to you again I'll unless your dad'll suck me off F#5 E5 B5 never talk to you again I'll unless your mom'll touch my cock F#5 E5 B5 never talk to you again I'll ejaculate into a sock F#5 E5 F#5 never talk to you again, I'll never talk to you again VERSE 2: (Played like Verse 1) B5 F#5 It's Labour Day and my Grandpa just ate seven fuckin' hotdogs B5 F#5 Labour Day and my Grandpa just ate seven fuckin' hotdogs G#5 And he shit, shit, shit his pants E5 he's always fuckin' shittin' his pants CHORUS: (Played like first Chorus) B5 F#5 E5 F#5 B5 And I'll never talk to you again I'll unless your dad'll suck me off F#5 E5 B5 never talk to you again I'll unless your mom'll touch my cock F#5 E5 B5 never talk to you again I'll ejaculate into a sock F#5 E5 F#5 B5 never talk to you again, I'll never talk to you again